Showing Up for Your Kids

Showing Up for Your Kids
On Saturday mornings, I host a room called, “Coffee and Kids,” on the social networking app Clubhouse, where we talk about all things parenting. A few Saturdays ago, I raised the topic of supporting our kids and posed the question, “How do you show up for your kids every day?” While the guests were processing and preparing to respond, I shared a big way in which we recently showed up for our daughter.

March 26th is Epilepsy Awareness Day. Those of you who know me know that I have a 22-year-old daughter who is diagnosed with epilepsy. The diagnosis came when she was 10 years old, so she has struggled with this illness for 12 years of her young life. She has had to manage her medications, making sure she takes them on a timely and regular schedule. She has had to significantly alter her lifestyle, ensuring she gets plenty of sleep and devotes sufficient time to stress management (as lack of sleep and stress are triggers to her seizures). She has had to learn to regulate her emotions and handle difficult situations, oftentimes by talking with friends and family or journaling (CLI created a wellness journal, Kickstarting Wellness, to help people manage stressors in their lives). She has had to learn and DO all of these things to take care of herself. As she has grown with this illness, she has also worked to educate others about epilepsy. To start, she would educate her friends and family about what they needed to do in the event that she had a seizure. Her advocacy surrounding epilepsy awareness and education steadily grew from there.

On March 26th, 2022, we showed up for our daughter in a big way. It was a Saturday, so my husband and oldest daughter were coaching their 18U softball team in a tournament. We decided to use this platform to shine a light on Epilepsy Awareness Day. We wanted to bring awareness to the players and their families, as well as to honor my youngest daughter’s strength in the face of this illness.

The color purple represents epilepsy. For the softball game on Epilepsy Awareness Day 2022, we wore our epilepsy awareness t-shirts, made cupcakes with purple icing, and painted our nails purple. The team wore purple ribbons in their hair. My daughter brought purple wristbands that said “Hope” and “Love,” which were worn by the players, coaches, and fans. We educated the girls on epilepsy, including how people are diagnosed and what they can do to help a person who is having a seizure.

It was a memorable day of awareness and advocacy. On top of that, we showed our daughter a great deal of support. We showed her how much we love her. It's incredibly important to show up for your kids - advocate for them, have their backs, cheer for them, stand up for them, support them. I encourage you to show up for your kids.

In honor of Epilepsy Awareness Day, here are some helpful tips for helping a person who is having a seizure:

• Keep other people out of the way.
  
• Clear hard or sharp objects away from the person.
  
• Don't try to hold them down or stop the movements.
  
• Place them on their side to help keep their airway clear.
  
• Look at your watch at the start of the seizure to time its length.
  
• Don't put anything in their mouth. Contrary to a popular myth, you can't swallow your tongue during a seizure. But if you put an object in their mouth, they could damage their teeth or bite you.
  
• Call 911 if the person has difficulty breathing or waking after the seizure or if the seizure lasts longer than 5 minutes.
  

What I have learned: Showing up for your kids is critical to their development. It shows them how much you love them. 

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